Friday, August 19, 2011

Week 9 Point Totals

Ohhhhh, we're neck-and-neck coming down the home stretch! Let's look at what went down this week.

Now that The Bachelorette is over, I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off of me. But alas, not all goodbyes are so happy. We bid adeiu to Basketball Wives this week, and I have to say that I'm going to miss those sassy broads. Little came our ways in terms of points this week -- just a paltry 5 points to Poyer with Evelyn's umpteenth vebal argument with fiance Chad Ochocinco. Even though they go at it, I think these crazy kids might just make it. Certainly, it will end better than Jennifer Williams' disaster divorce from ex Eric. What kind of a man throws a drink in a woman's face. That was some messed up nonsense right there.

Speaking of dousing a woman in something that ought only be used to quench thirst, shit got crazy over on The Challenge: Rivals. The whole gang packed up and flew to Buenes Aires, where tensions between the house and CT and the house and Cara Maria came to their boiling points. First there was a crazy night out at the club where people who make their money from MTV once again proved the worst possible American ambassadors on Earth. There were hookups galore, a confrontation between CT and what's left of the Big Men on Campus. Then, back at the house, Wes decided that as punishment for being "immature" he would dump an entire two-liter bottle of "cola" on Cara Maria's head. After her initial shock she slinked away to her bedroom where I'm sure she immediately regretted applying as much non-waterproof mascara as she did. But partner and newfound-friend Laurel came to her rescue, not only kicking "ginger" Wes out of their bedroom but blasting anyone in her path with verbal assaults that may have crossed the line but which certainly got the job done. So here's how the (many) points were doled out:

Helen's Team:

Wes sucessfully made Cara cry (25), made out with Mandi in the club (5) and got into an argument with Laurel (5). Paula had a three-way kiss with Mandi and Ev, as well as kissing mainstay Mike for a whopping 15 kissing points, cried after being majorly put in her place by Laurel (5) and unintentionally showed more than she anticipated in what can only be described as a ransacking of the beautiful house these heathens were given to live in (5). As mentioned, Mandi netted points for kissing a couple people (10). Tyler also god naked during the ransacking and got in verbal argument action (5) after Laurel got in his good friend Paula's face. I wish there were extra point awarded for attempting to save a piano from getting doused in "cola" because, boy, would Tyler be raking it in. CT avoided physical blows but participated in the verbal beat down in the club (5) in which Bananas also joined in on (5).

Poyer's Team:

Laurel got into verbal fights with Paula, Wes AND Tyler (15) points, and successfully brought Paula to tears (25). Jenn got her kiss on (10), as did Ev at a slower rate (5).

But the big story this week was the inaugural episode of Bachelor Pad. It was everything that I hoped it would be. After our draft last week, I think that both Poyer and I are happy with our choices. First of all, the trainwreck that is Jake Pavelka and Vienna Girardi being in the same house is panning out quite nicely. Vienna looks to have been bred for reality television participation and Jake is perhaps even more smug than I have ever seen him! Jake only netted 10 points for winning the challenge this week but Vienna proved to be a fantastic first-round draft, pulling in 10 points for arguments, both in a hot tub (10 extra points), intentional nudity pre-coitus (45). Her partner, guarder and protector of everything holy, Kasey Kahl also got points from said coitus (25) and some points from the argument (5) in the hot tub (5). Michelle Money was a little slow coming out of the gate with only 5 verbal argument points. Something tells me her crazy is going to pay off though.


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