Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Player Profile: Sean Young

When drafting for a reality TV fantasy league, one approaches his picks like any good baseball or football fantasy league player.

1. Review past performance
2. Read scouting reports
3. Predict behaviors based upon those around the player

After careful contemplation, Sean Young seemed like a bit of a no-brainer. But for those people younger than 30 or not possessing the pop-culture knowledge of a savant, she may not seem familiar at all. Here's a quick refresher course.

Sean was born in 1959 in Kentucky, attended school in Cleveland Heights (which is a pretty awful place for anyone wanting to get more out of their life than working at a Piggly Wiggly). But Sean was tall and pretty and had ambition, so she became a dancer and a model and then broke through into films. By the early '80s, she landed the lead role in Blade Runner.

For those of you not in the know, it's a dystopian futuristic flick starring Harrison Ford, which is now mostly remembered by hipsters throwing theme parties and trying to be cool.

After that there were a string of hits: Dune, where everyone got high on something called spice and had crazy blue eyes, and No Way Out, where Kevin Costner did Salt better than Angelina Jolie did Salt, and Sean played a sexy affair-time lover.

And then the crazy times started. Sean was cast as Michael Douglas' wife in Wall Street. It was, reportedly, a pretty meaty role. But Sean and director Oliver Stone butted heads. He haaaaaated her, and he cut the part significantly, reportedly sending her on her merry way, unceremoniously having some underling just drop her off at a train station.

The next year she starred in The Boost, a forgettable flick co-starring James Woods. That's when shit really went south. See, there was supposedly some flirtation going on between the two and it didn't pan out--in the worst possible way. According to James, Sean got mad about the whole thing and went a little cray cray, eventually leaving a mutilated baby doll of his stoop. Um... that is pretty insane. James and his fiancee sued Sean, and Sean said that the whole thing was about her rejecting James' advances.

This turned out to be the beginning in a long string of career and life setbacks. She lost the role of Tess Trueheart in Dick Tracey to Madonna--he said she wasn't maternal enough for the role, she (again) said that he wanted to start a relationship and he declined. She got lead female role in Batman but lost it when she fell off of a horse and injured herself. This devastated her. So when the sequel rolled around, she dressed up as Catwoman and moseyed on down to the studio lot.

Then, about 15 years of radio silence. Her career stalled. She moved out of Hollywood. She had failed attempts to sneak into Vanity Fair Oscar after-parties and showed up drunk to awards shows.

After years of drowning her sorrows in alcohols (an even an appearance on Skating With the Stars), she's seeking help with Dr. Drew on national television.


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